Dear kids,
I thought I should write to explain why we’re taking you to the other side of the world. I know you’re looking forward to escaping this rain and seeing the dazzling-white beaches we’ve shown you in the pictures, but I know you don’t really understand what it all means yet. To be honest, many of the grown ups around us are struggling to get their head around our decision. I just want to make sure you to grow up knowing why we did it.
You see, before any of you arrived, your daddy and I went travelling…
This is how your mummy and daddy looked before you arrived.
During our round-the-world trip a few years ago, we spent three months driving a camper van around Australia. We took in lungful of clear air, we strolled along deserted beaches, we drank freshly brewed coffee in pavement cafes, we flew kites on windswept hills, we saw flaming red sunsets, we paddled with dolphins, we actually saw the night sky for the very first time, we sailed to pristine islands on a tall ship, we watched turtles scramble onto the beach to lay eggs, we swam with sharks, we woke to the sound of kookaburras, we walked in the tropical rain, we snorkelled over reefs teeming with colourful fish, we tasted wine from boutique vineyards, we drove straight for hours without seeing another car and we grew together by sharing the experience. We were alive in a way we’d never been before.
During the trip, we met a lot of retired English couples taking a break in the sun. All of them told us they’d dreamed of emigrating when they were young. We saw the flecks of regret in their eyes and we heard their pleas for us to make every second count. They told us they wished they could go back to being our age and make their choices all over again, because they would choose differently. They would take the risk. They would do what was right for them, not what was right for others. They told us how they wished they could be where we were, at the start of our lives together with adventures still to look forward to. These meetings made us feel infinite and fragile at the same time – we had everything to live for and our whole lives in front of us, but it was terrifying to see how this decision of whether to emigrate was a major fork in the road that we needed to face.
We came home to find out we were expecting you boys, and the thought of tearing you away from your grandparents was too much to think about, so we decided to stay. But our longing for somewhere else has never left us. We have a thirst for something, and we need to follow it. Not just for us, but for you too. We don’t want you to be scared to follow your dreams.
Australia is our dream, but it’s all about you too. We’re doing this for you. I can’t promise it’s going to be a smooth or perfect transition. I can’t even promise we’re all going to love it and stay there forever. What I do know is that we have to try because, if not, your daddy and I will be one of those couples in twenty years wondering if we made the right choices for you. We hope this move introduces you to the big wide world. We hope you’re inspired to learn about nature, the environment, space, geology and wildlife like we were when we first travelled to Australia . We hope we get to spend lots more time outside together in the sunshine, enjoying our precious family time.
It’s a huge decision for us to make on your behalf, and we’ve spent five years debating to make sure it’s the right one. Nothing in my life has ever felt so right (apart from maybe marrying your daddy, but don’t tell him that as it’ll make him big-headed).
I can’t imagine where we’ll be five years from now. Will you three have Aussie accents? Will we own our own home over there? Will it have a pool or be near the beach? Will the three of you be enjoying school? Will we have moved back to the UK, accepting the financial loss from a move in both directions? I can’t answer any of those things, but what I can say is your daddy and I will carry on making decisions with you at the heart of them. We will both do absolutely anything for you, as your happiness is the most important thing in the world to us.
I hope you enjoy our new life on the other side of the world, and that it’s everything we’re dreaming of for you.
All my love,
Mummy
xx
If you’re enjoying reading about our emigration journey, you might want to nominate my blog in the best family travel category of the MAD Blog Awards (and any other category too if you like!)
You can read all about our journey so far on the Our Oz Adventure page
I want to move to Australia! Can I come?! Great post. I think it’s so brave to have the courage to follow your dreams like that. I fear sometimes I may end up like one of those couples one day and that shouldn’t happen. Life’s too short. Good luck with it all. X
Thanks for your comment. It’s such a hard decision to make. We debated for so long, then one day something clicked and we decided to go for it. Instantly it felt right. Maybe you’ll have that moment too. It also helped that hubby’s job here is going to end in a year or two anyway, so that gave us the push we needed. I’m a firm believer in following your dreams, not matter how difficult or challenging they might be. If you want to do it, I’m sure you will one day. xxx
Ahhhh that brought a tear to my eyes , I admire your take on life and the way you are following your dreams and giving it a go. Good luck x
Thanks Steph. You’ll have to come out to visit! xx
Aw what a lovely post. I’m 27, and my parents emigrated to Melbourne last feb when I was pregnant with my little one. There in their early fifties and having the time of their lives. My mums only regret is that she didn’t do it sooner when we (my brother and I) were younger. Your children are so lucky, they will have an amazing upbringing there. Unfortunately I would have gone to but due to having a step son we couldn’t leave him Baal in the uk. But thankfully we get to holiday there so I’m lucky. I wish you all the luck in the world for your families new adventure. 🙂
Thanks. It sounds like you have the best of both worlds! I just wish we could take our parents with us, as leaving them is going to be so hard. Hopefully if hubby gets a job with an airline we should be able to come back for visits easily. xx
This is a beautiful post, Karen. We wanted to emigrate to Australia six years ago and reading your letter feels like our story. The only difference is there was only one little boy! You are very brave to make the jump with the family… no regrets for you guys (I wish we had your guts!). x Mel
It’s so so hard and I can see why people like the idea of it but don’t actually go (we possibly wouldn’t be doing this if hubby’s job hadn’t been in trouble here, as that’s what gave us the push to do it). It’s finally the right time for us to make the move. I have no idea if we’ll want to stay there forever, but I’m excited for the future. xx
I have tears in my eyes too, I feel the pull of pastures new having lived in Germany for 3 years! I wish we could have stayed, but it wasn’t going to happen. Maybe the future will be different, but for now we stay where we are because of the boys and stability and schools etc. I admire your bravery, you need to make it work now, otherwise you’re stuck in the school cycle. Good luck and all the best, the accidental Haus Frau x x
It’s great that you were able to have the experience of living there for three years, and who knows, maybe you’ll go back again in the future? I think travel opens up your minds so much and I’m sure your boys will have got a lot out of the experience too. xx
What a great post, and such a lovely idea for your boys. The husband and I have talked about emigrating over the last few years, and more recently over the last few months. We would both love to emigrate to Hong Kong after travelling there last year. We instantly fell in love with the place and dreamed of living the expat lifestyle and raising a family there. Now that we are now new parents to a six month old baby, we are just not sure whether we can tear her and ourselves away from our closely knit families. But your post stirred a longing in me that hasnt gone away, and re-ignited that desire to emigrate. Of course such a big life change is always going to be a massive decision, but I feel a little bit braver about seriously considering it having read your post, so thank you.
I hope the move goes well to Aus. I will be looking out for your future posts – what an exciting journey ahead!
Thanks for your comment. Just give it some time. We were determined to emigrate when I was pregnant with my boys in 2009, and then as soon as they arrived we changed our minds. It was just too hard to take them away from family. It’s still going to be hard but now they can chat on the phone/Skype which will make keeping in touch easier. I’m a firm believer that big decisions like this make themselves when the time is right for you. xx
Welcome to Australia! What a lovely post, such a treasure for your twins.
Thanks! We’re still waiting on the final stages of our visa at the moment, but hope to be able to move over in July/August depending on how long our house takes to sell. Eek it’s so exciting. xx
You ARE doing the right thing. My Australian husband and I did exactly the same thing when our daughter was 17 months old. We wanted to experience Australian life. We made another decision to come back when she was 3, and we are still here in the UK, but we go back to Oz to visit my husband’s family when we can (never often enough to make it enough). We wish we could divide our time, but that’s an impossible dream. When we lived out in Sydney, my mum came and stayed for 6 week stretches, and it was a whole new relationship, we really lived together in a way we can’t now. Australian life taught me a lot which I brought back to the UK, about community, friendliness, equality, a practical and open attitude, mixed with just a pinch of hardiness. We really loved our time there. I think what you are doing, actually emigrating, is the best way to do it, because we remained torn with a flat and mother in the UK. Just go for it, of course you will miss things, but people always said to us that it is a wonderful place to raise a family, and we felt the same way – we had to come back for work rather than because we weren’t enjoying our lives.
This made me cry for some reason. What you are doing is full of courage – I really hope it is wonderful over there and very happy for you all
This is so lovely Karen – I have no doubt you are making the right decision for your family and you will have the most fantastic life out there.
I’ve traveled Australia too so totally understand the appeal and am a bit jealous myself to be fair. I may need to stop following your blog when you get there x